I had actually already known who she was for about a year or so, and knew that she had a young son. What I didn’t know was that she was in the process of getting divorced. So when we meet at a mutual friends place, sparks flying, I was pretty weirded out. She then found me on facebook, of course, and started to pursue. Many things where going through my mind at this point. The sparks are flying but, what about her husband or should I say ex-husband? Is he some raving lunatic that is going to come after me guns blazing for stealing his son? Am I ready to have an instant family? Is her son going to think I’m his dad? So many questions.

Well it has now been about eight months since I started seeing her, and it seems things aren’t as bad as I made them out to be. Since the two of us actually think alike on just about everything, we have been able to talk about all of these issues and work them out. It also seems that four year old boys are smarter than I gave credit, yes, he knows I’m not his dad. But kids are impressionable, and you do have to watch what you say and do. One thing she has learned from a mandatory course, is that you can’t be trying to buy a child’s affection with gifts. You are just going to have to earn it.

Over this time she has made it known to her son that she is going to have someone else in her life, which he seems to be cool with. Her and I agreed from the beginning that he has a dad and that all I can be is his friend. But that’s all anyone can do with someone else’s child, be their friend. But, she also made him aware that I am an adult and have authority, so what I say goes too. So it’s not really like having an instant family, but more like having a new friend.

In the end I think that communication is the key. My girlfriend and I can talk about anything that is on our mind, but unfortunately, to many relationships out there end up in ruins because there is no communication. Like I said, I never thought I’d be dating a single mom, but so far, so good.

As for her ex, his is still going to be apart of her son’s life(which is very good) and she says I have nothing to worry about. Whew.

K.R. Hayden

View more on divorce at http://krh-divorce.blogspot.com

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Ways to Catch a Cheating Husband in the Act

According to the Rutland (Vt.) Herald, the Windsor Junior-Senior High School offered shelter to Windsor County and Windham County police last week while they received training instruction on what to do when a gunman invades a school. The training is being provided by Vermont State Police, and is one of many being performed throughout the state of Vermont.

These training exercises are a result of school shooting incidents such as the one that occurred last year in Essex Junction. In that event, Christopher Williams allegedly brought a gun into the school, killing a teacher and wounding another in a search for his ex-girlfriend.

Detective Trooper Steven Otis of the Rockingham police barracks says the training is referred to as “active shooter intervention”. The types of situation they are training for are those incidents similar to the one in Essex Junction with Christopher Williams from last year. According to Otis, training has also taken place at a nearby airport.

Randy Christensen, the school resource officer at Windsor High School, offered the school for training the police officers because he has experienced school violence first hand. Christensen worked as a police officer in Lake Worth, Florida when a thirteen year old boy brought a gun to school and killed a teacher. He states that while he and his fellow officers were well trained, they hadn’t received training on what to do in that type of situation. He believes that training for guns and shooters in schools is essential to protect students and faculty alike.

Back in January, a teenager that was hunting squirrels near the middle school was mistaken for a threat. Officer Allison Forney of the Bellows Falls Police Department said that in that situation, “training would have been helpful”. Part of the training would include how to separate threats from innocents, such as the hunting teen.

The commander of the state police outpost in Rockingham, Lieutenant Jocelyn Stohl, agrees that the training exercises are necessary for officers to determine actual threats from perceived ones, and will also help hone the officers’ skills. She states “when an event does happen, we can make an organized and standard response. Overall, since September 11, our state has come up to speed very quickly. Here, we’re going to select the first responders. In this state, anyone can be a first responder, so you have to train the people apt to go through it.”

Windsor Schools Superintendent Brenda Needham named school security as one of her top priorities, prompting her to support Christensen’s decision to offer the high school as a training site. She told reporters, “We pay a lot of attention to safety and security. We reached out to the police. I thought we might serve as a vehicle for state police and local departments to use for a training site. We certainly want to support any kind of exercise, and I’m happy to have them here. We have a very safe school, but we are proactive in these matters. We know you have to be diligent about security.”

Source: The Rutland Herald, 2007, http://www.rutlandherald.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070702/NEWS02/707020367/1003/NEWS02

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Three Signs of a Cheating Girlfriend

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Reverse Cell Look-Up Online - Use This Technique to Bust a Cheating Spouse!

During the course of the conversation, we began talking about how amazing it is that so many people are more willing to take the first option that comes along when it comes to dating and relationships than to do what it takes to become a man or a woman who can CHOOSE from MANY OPTIONS.

Ultimately, so many of us feel completely powerless when it comes to actually being able to attract who we truly want, that when the first person comes along who shows any level of attraction we jump right in. Sometimes we do so and never look back.

If you perform a Google search on “number of lifetime sex partners”, you’ll quickly find that darn near 25% of adults (at least in North America) report having had exactly one partner in their life.

Sure, there are always those who have the “high school sweetheart” story going on.

But not withstanding that, you and I both know that there are a WHOLE LOT of people out there who are flat-out, straight-up SETTLING.

Worse, even though they KNOW they’ve settled, they stay in the relationship anyway. All too often, they end up getting MARRIED.

Why?

Well, there’s a whole litany of potential excuses.

“It was just time to get married, and this was who I was dating at the time.”

Or, “Well, nobody’s perfect…and I don’t want to be too picky.”

Or, “Hey…some people out there have NOBODY. I should count myself as LUCKY.”

And, of course, the one that truly makes me cringe: “She was willing to put up with me.”

But here’s the thing.

Sometimes, you really can be fairly excited about having met a certain woman early on. You can even be genuinely HOT for her.

Particularly if you haven’t been experiencing a dating life full of rich options lately, you could actually meet a woman who exceeds your expectations and be on Cloud 9 for a while there.

Only after time has passed and you wake up one morning feeling dissatisfied will the reality set in that you had in fact SETTLED.

Scary stuff, isn’t it?

There’s no wonder so many women think guys are “commitment phobes”.

The truth is sometimes we SHOULD BE.

So how do we solve this problem? How can you know UP FRONT that you may wake up feeling like you settled someday?

I mean, how can you really get some 20/20 FORESIGHT here, for a change?

I’m glad you asked.

Here, before your very eyes, I’m about to roll out-for the first time ever-a lucky seven ways you can TEST a new relationship for “Settlement Potential”:

1) When considering a brand new woman to date, teleport yourself into the future and HONESTLY consider how you’ll feel having been exclusive with JUST her for a few months.

You may think she’s pretty sharp, but if you honestly evaluate the situation do you already know she’s lacking in a few places that you are going to seriously wish she wasn’t after the novelty of the relationship wears off?

Every day you may see women you find somewhat attractive, and each will endear themselves to you in a distinct way-and to a varying degree.

With that sea of women around you, understand that building long-term plans with a woman who doesn’t bring your vision of the “complete package” to the table is going to mean inevitable comparison to other women down the road.

And that’s not going to be a positive for either of you.

2) How do you feel about introducing her to your friends?

She may be attractive to you, but are you sort of embarrassed to take her out in public? Do you fear your friends are going to think you could “do better”?

Is there a chance she’ll publicly humiliate you in a social setting?

If you’re feeling any of this stuff, it makes no logical sense to form a “partnership” with her.

3) Imagine you have already seen her naked 100 times and had sex with her about as often.

Are you going to have long since been bored? Do you already look at her and realize she isn’t everything you want in the attraction department?

Even if you are obsessed over her extreme hotness, have you considered that if the entire relationship has been built around sex that you WILL burn out sooner than later…perhaps based on sheer familiarity?

4) Do you enjoy her company?

This might sound like a goofball question. But based on what I’ve seen out there, I had to ask.

She may be the “best thing” who has come along in years, or so you think. But are you basing that premise purely on physical attraction? If she gets on your nerves now-or vice-versa-that isn’t going to get any better later, I can assure you.

5) Is life more fulfilling with her in it?

Are you looking forward to taking her with you on the next adventure you have planned, or would you much rather leave her at home to watch Lifetime Channel while you spend time with your friends instead?

Do you foresee your future plans and lifelong dreams coming to fruition with her in your life, or being postponed–if not scuttled completely?

6) Are you trying to overlook serious character issues?

Are you sticking your head in the sand when it’s clear she has addictions, jealousy issues or a demonstrated history of disrespecting you? Are you fully confident she wouldn’t cheat on you or betray you in some other way?

Do you get this strange feeling that there’s something about her you’re not being told?

7) Do you envy guys who appear to have higher-quality women with them?

Do you get that nauseous feeling in the pit of your stomach when you go out and see other guys with women you perceive to be higher quality?

Have you actually gone so far as to COUNT how many guys in a particular public place you’d gladly trade places with?

Do you come home from social events feeling angry or even resentful toward your woman even though she didn’t do anything in particular to cause it?

Did some of those concepts hit home for you?

It really doesn’t matter whether you have a woman in your life right now or not. The stuff we’re talking about here must become part of your mindset as you evaluate the potential of various women who step into your life.

Usually when you take a test like this, you end up with a “sliding scale” to score yourself with.

Not this time, man.

This is like horseshoes and hand grenades. It’s “all or nothing”. If you’ve compromised ANYWHERE, you’re settling.

I know that the simple fact you are here reading this newsletter alone represents that you are one of those who refuse to accept mediocrity.

Deserving what you want is the ONLY WAY TO FLY, and you know that already.

Scot McKay’s character-based dating and seduction strategies for men are found at: http://www.thechickwhisperer.com

Stop by right now and Scot will personally send you a FREE 8-part mini-course ($47 value) when you sign up for the X & Y Communications Newsletter.

Also be sure to check out The Chick Whisperer podcast on iTunes.

Expect the unexpected is the phrase always associated with Big Brother and this season is no exception. This season started out with 7 girls being let into the house, just as they were getting comfortable they sent in 9 guys, the biggest number of people on a big brother season yet. Then the twists begin.

The first twist that we find out is that unbeknown to her Sharon’s ex-boyfriend is also going to be a house guest. We find out that they were together for a long time, but broke up because he cheated on her. The second twist that we find out is that Ryan and Jen are dating and they are both going into the house to try and win together. As the house guests get to know each other Julie appears on the screen with another twist. Julie explains that they have paired each of the house guests with another house guest as their “soul mate” She explains that you will have to do everything with your soul mate from the competitions to HOH and even being put up for eviction. Julie then pairs everybody up.

The partners are:

Alex & Amanda
Ryan & Allison
James & Chelsia
Jacob & Sharon
Matt & Natalie
Joshua & Neil
Adam & Shelia
Parker & Jen

So that means that the ex-boyfriend and ex-girlfriend are paired together, and the real life couple Jen and Ryan have different partners. There is also a gay couple. Most couples were happy with the choices, while Sharon was anything but happy. Sharon was really upset that not only was her ex in the house but that she had to be paired with him. Jacob on the other hand didn’t really seem to mind, he even stated that he knew Sharon was his sole mate. The Other very unhappy couple was Adam and Shelia, they got off to a lousy start by Adam calling her “Ma”. Shelia was very upset saying that he was not her type at all.

The first competition begins right away. Julie explains that the winners of this competition will have to evict another team within hours. They go outside and the competition is all set up, each team has to choose one person to put on a harness and that team member has to hold the other team member in the air without letting them fall on the bed below. Adam And Shelia are the first to drop out followed shortly by Joshua and Neil. When half of the couple have dropped out Julie lets the house guests know about the second part of the competition. If they can manage to grab a pillow from below them, and then are the winning team they will win $10,000. The final two couple come down to Matt and Natalie, and Parker and Jen. Jen and Parker have a pillow so they tell Matt and Natalie they will be safe if they drop out. Matt and Natalie decide to drop out, so the winners are Parker and Jen.

What will happen next? Who will Parker and Jen choose to evict? We will have to watch tomorrow to find out, be sure to come back tomorrow for my next article on everything that happened in the ext episode of Big brother 9 ’til death do you part.

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Do You Really Think That Your Spouse is Cheating? Want to Find Out in 5 Minutes? Read This!

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5 Things You Must Do Right Away to Save Your Marriage If You Cheated

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